How lack of confidence affects you and your weight

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Do you lack confidence?

Do you struggle with your weight?

You might think that the reason you lack confidence is because of your weight, and as soon as you lose weight, you’ll feel confident again.

But many people lose weight, only to discover that their confidence doesn’t improve. Despite reaching their fitness goals, they still feel insecure, doubt themselves and still want to hide away. You may have even experienced this yourself.

The reason for this is because you’re focusing on external confidence, instead of internal confidence.

External confidence

Of course, losing weight can make you feel happier and more confident. But the problem with relying on weight loss (or any other external factor) to boost your confidence, is that you’ll lose your confidence when the external thing no longer exists.

For example, you go on a diet, you lose weight and you feel great. Your confidence has improved and you’re wearing clothes you haven’t worn in years. But because you dieted to lose weight (as opposed to changing your lifestyle), your weight loss doesn’t last. And so, when the weight comes back, your confidence takes a dive again.

This is very common, and often comes as a result of believing the marketing lies that the fitness and weight loss industry use to get you to sign up to their program — that when you have your dream body, you’ll finally love yourself and feel confident.

But to be truly confident, you need to develop your inner, or internal confidence.

Internal confidence

Internal confidence is a confidence you feel regardless of your weight, dress size, appearance, or any other external factors such as income, status, or material possessions.

Internal confidence is grounded in:

  • believing you have value
  • believing in your skills and abilities
  • following your own path
  • living a life of integrity (e.g. being true to your word and doing what you say you’re going to do)
  • knowing that as a human being, you are worth something, and that this doesn’t depend on your clothing size, a number on the scale, or how good you look in a pair of jeans.

How lack of confidence affect you?

Now that you understand the difference between external and internal confidence, let’s look at how a lack of confidence (or relying on external confidence) may be affecting your weight, and other areas of your life.

If you lack confidence, you’ll probably say things like:

  • I can’t…
  • I don’t have what it takes to…
  • When I’ve lost a bit of weight I’ll…
  • When the time is right, I’ll be able to…
  • I just don’t have the time to…
  • What if I fail at…
  • I’ve never been good at…
  • I’m not good enough to…
  • I could never do…
  • It’s not realistic for me to…
  • What will people think if I…

What follows the phrases above can be anything from weight loss goals, body shape goals, career goals, or earning potential.

I can’t lose weight.

I’ve never been good at public speaking.

It’s not realistic for me to earn a six-figure income.

I could never be consistent with exercise.

You see, a lack of confidence is really about doubting yourself — doubting your value, your beliefs, your ideas, your self-worth, your abilities, and your potential. And this can have a massive effect on your weight loss efforts, as well as the rest of your life.

When you don’t believe in yourself, you’ll continue to do things that keep you comfortable, and you’ll continue to do things for others, before putting your own needs first.

How your lack of confidence affects others

You might think that you’re the only one affected by your low confidence levels. But you’re wrong. When you’re lacking in confidence, you affect all the people around you — especially your kids.

As a parent, you are your kids’ most influential role model. If you live your life without confidence, you’re teaching your kids to do the same. This can lead to kids who:

  • can’t make decisions
  • never try new things
  • are afraid of what other people think
  • can’t stand up for what they believe in
  • succumb to peer pressure
  • bully others to feel better about themselves
  • are scared to take risks
  • live a life based in fear.

Your lack of confidence will also negatively impact your relationships and your career prospects.

Confidence needs to come first

To achieve anything in life you need the inner confidence we discussed above. Because unless you really believe in yourself and are confident in what you’re doing, self-doubt will always hold you back.

That’s why our Body & Lifestyle Transformation Program is called Confidence Avalanche. We know that confidence is required to achieve permanent weight loss and body shape change. And that’s what we focus on with our clients.

Everyone has some area of their life they’re not confident in. But when you develop the internal confidence, you’ll find that you’ll be more willing to move out of your comfort zone, more willing to try new things, and more willing to take risks — all of which helps you grow and develop as a person, so you can achieve whatever you set out to achieve, and be the best role model you can be.

Read our next blog on how you can boost your confidence.

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People don’t have weight problems, people have personal problems (identities, habits, mindset, beliefs and fears) that reflect throughout their life, which can’t be resolved with dieting and focusing on food and exercise.

Dieting and focusing on food and exercise without addressing the habits and mindset that got us overweight is just like refilling a flat punctured tyre with air over and over without sealing the puncture and addressing the cause — a waste of time.

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