If you’ve tried to lose weight on your own before, you probably know how hard it is.
If this has been a regular pattern for you, you’ve probably been blaming yourself for not being able to lose the weight. But aside from the fact that diets just don’t work, another thing that’s been working against you is that you’ve been trying to do it alone.
However, if you work with a weight loss coach, you’re much more likely to succeed.
Signs you need a coach
How do you know you need a weight loss coach? If you can relate to any of the following, then working with a coach will change your life:
- You think you know what to do to lose weight, but you’re not doing it
- You worry about what other people think about you
- You’re scared of trying new things in case you fail
- You’re afraid of change and will do anything to avoid it
- You’re not fulfilled or happy in life
- Your business and personal life don’t align
- Your bank account is high but your health or quality of life is low
- You hide behind what you think know
- You find it hard to admit you don’t know something
- You don’t feel like you’re living with purpose
- Business life is taking a toll on your physical and mental health, and your relationships
- You have trouble prioritising yourself
- You start and stop things and never finish anything
- You use alcohol, food or material things to fill the void in your life or numb your feelings
- You pretend to be someone you’re not
- You blame others for your situation.
What is coaching?
Coaching is a form of development in which an experienced person, called a coach, supports a learner or client in achieving a specific personal or professional goal by providing training and guidance.
- create a safe environment in which you can see yourself more clearly
- identify gaps between where the client is and where the client needs or wants to be
- identify habits or mindsets that are holding their client back from achieving their goals
- ask for more intentional thought, action and behaviour changes than the client would ask of themselves
- keep communication open and honest between themselves and the client
- provide accountability, structure and support in order to keep their client committed to their goals, and progressing towards achieving them.
Coaching is not:
- enabling the client in behaviours that are sabotaging their success or telling the client what they want to hear
- the coach setting the goals and telling the client what to do
- expecting the coach to be responsible for your outcomes or success
- a one-way arrangement where the coach does everything for you.
Who uses coaches?
Bill Gates famously said in one of his TED talks, “Everyone needs a coach”.
A lot of people believe that coaching is only for those people who have ‘something wrong with them’. For example, they’re weak, have lots of problems, are stupid, can’t think for themselves, aren’t experienced enough, don’t know enough, or are underperformers.
However, some of the most successful people on the planet use coaches. Richard Branson, Tony Robbins, Oprah Winfrey, Serena Williams, Barack Obama, and even Bill Gates himself. Some of the world’s top athletes even employ several coaches, who specialise in coaching different aspects of their game.
So if coaches are good enough for the world’s most successful people in their fields whether it’s sport, politics, or business, why don’t more people use them, especially when it comes to something they’ve failed to achieve on their own, like losing weight and changing their body shape?
Why people avoid coaching
If you ask people why they don’t have a weight loss coach, you may hear answers such as the following:
- “I’m too old.”
- “No one understands my situation.”
- “A woman can’t train me like a man can.”
- “They’re not shredded enough to know what they’re doing.”
- “I can lift more than they can, so why do I need them?”
- “They know nothing about my life.”
- “They haven’t been through what I have been through.”
- “They don’t know my body like I do.”
- “I’m happy as I am.”
- “They don’t have kids, so they can’t relate to me.”
- “I’m more successful than they are.”
- “They don’t have as much life experience as I do.”
- “I already know what to do, so how will they help?”
In all honesty, the above are just excuses disguised as practicalities.
The real truth as to why people avoid weight loss coaching, is because they are afraid. They’re afraid of being vulnerable, scared of change, scared of being seen as weak, afraid they’re inadequate, afraid of doing the work, scared of what others will think of them, and afraid of being held accountable.
These fears basically boil down to two things, fear of failure and fear of judgement.
Fear of failure
Setting out to achieve something can be a daunting task, especially if it’s something you’ve struggled with in the past, and there’s no guarantee that you’ll achieve your goals. So instead of focusing on what could go right, most people focus on failing, and ask themselves what happens if they fail, or put in all the work and still don’t’ succeed? How will I cope if I fail? What does this failure mean about me?
A lot of people are scared about not being able to do something, so they hide in the familiar where it’s safe. They never take chances, or commit to learning something new. Their fear of failure paralyses them and prevents them from taking action. They feel that if they’re going to fail, they don’t want anyone to see them do it. So they continue to try to lose weight on their own, knowing that they can hide and not be made accountable if they fail. But this guarantees you’ll fail, because without accountability, you’ll only do what you feel like doing, or you’ll do what you think will give you results instead of what will get you results. Plus, without the added accountability factor, you’ll give up when it gets too hard.
Fear of failure is also closely linked to fear of judgement, especially if you’ve tried to lose weight many times and not succeeded. That’s because you’re worried that you’ll be judged by family, friends and colleagues if you fail again.
Fear of judgement
Our most basic human need is to be loved and accepted, which is why people try so hard to ‘fit in’. However, working with a coach requires you to be vulnerable and honest about your weaknesses or the things you struggle with, which many people are afraid to do. For example, someone who is successful in business, may be afraid to admit that they can’t control their binges at night, or their drinking on the weekend because they don’t want to be judged as inadequate or not having ‘their act together’.
Working with a coach to lose weight will also require you to put yourself first instead of spending your days pleasing other people. This can cause you to worry about what other people will think of you, and how your life may change as a result of your choices. For example, someone whose friendships are based around alcohol consumption may be afraid of how their relationships will change if they cut back on drinking. They might be worried about whether their friends will still see them as ‘fun’, whether they’ll still be invited to go out, or whether their friends will be upset with them for changing the status quo.
However, if you continue to give into your fears of failure and fears of being judged, you’ll continue to do things that appear to keep you safe. In reality though, staying safe will keep you in a world of pain, and you’ll find it next to impossible to lose weight and have the life you dream of having.
Why you need a weight loss coach
The key reason to work with a coach is because they can see the blind spots that you can’t see. Everyone has blind spots — those areas of your life, your game (if you’re an athlete), or your business that you can’t see because you’re too emotionally involved — that hinder your success. This explains why even the most successful people in the world hire coaches — because they know they have blind spots that are getting in their way, and preventing them from being better or more successful.
One of the core beliefs of people who work with a coach is that if they can change something, they can perform at a higher level. They’re not afraid of being judged or of failing. They’re just trying to be better at what they do, and they know that the smartest, most efficient way of being better is to get a coach to help them.
You’d think that if anyone didn’t need a coach, it would be those who were at the top of their game, like athletes who are the best in the world at what they do. But if these people need a coach to keep getting better, even though they’re already the best in their field, who are you not to have one?
A weight loss coach is a valuable member of your weight loss support team because they can help you identify your blind spots. This example may help you understand what this means.
Debbie struggles with emotional eating. She believes she does it because she’s stressed, but she doesn’t know what’s causing the stress. When talking to her weight loss coach about what happens, her coach is able to recognise that the reason Debbie is stressed is because she compares herself with others all the time. This causes Debbie to feel worthless, inadequate and empty in comparison, and so she soothes herself by eating as a way to fill the void she feels.
By helping Debbie understand what is causing her to feel stressed, Debbie’s coach has given her clarity around what is triggering her emotional eating. Now she is aware that it’s her habit of comparing, she can start working towards dropping this habit, which will in turn reduce the likelihood of her emotionally eating.
But without a plan, Debbie won’t know the best way to change this habit. Instead, she’d be likely to rely on willpower, which will only get her so far. Or, she’d end up focusing on things that wouldn’t help her overcome her habit of comparing. That’s where her coach comes in. They will be able to develop an action plan that will help Debbie overcome her habit of comparing herself with others. They will also build a level of accountability into the plan, to ensure that Debbie does the things that will help her change this habit.
Because weight loss coaches are emotionally removed from your situation, and have been through the same thing, or helped others who have been through the same thing, they are able to recognise the habits or mindsets that are holding you back. They also know what does and doesn’t work. This takes the guesswork out of trying to overcome your hurdles on your own, which means faster results for you, without the stress and hassle.
What if I’m already successful?
A lot of people who are successful in business believe that they don’t need a coach, and that to use one is a sign of weakness. However, many successful business owners have trouble living a balanced life and prioritising themselves. They put all of their energies into making money and end up compromising their physical health, their mental health, and the quality of their relationships. Let’s look at an example.
Brett is a successful business owner who runs 2 businesses. He has been in business for over 30 years, and is quite well-off. He has a very healthy bank account, lives in a nice house, and has money to spend on overseas trips, nice cars, a couple of investment properties, and a holiday house.
However, Brett spends most of his days working. Between running 2 businesses, and taking care of his employees, he barely has time for anything else. He buys his lunch on the run each day and often goes through a fast-food drive-thru because he can eat and drive at the same time. Because of his long days, Brett doesn’t have time for exercise. By the time he gets home, the last thing he feels like doing is working out, so instead, he unwinds with a couple of beers. This, coupled with his poor eating habits has contributed to him gaining a significant amount of weight in recent years.
His marriage is also going through a difficult patch. He and his wife don’t have any quality time together anymore. In fact, the only time they’ve really spent together in the last 12 months is talking about their kids, or arguing with each other. Brett’s wife has suggested they go and see a relationship counsellor, but Brett says he doesn’t have time. Fed up with being at the bottom of Brett’s priority list, his wife ends up asking him for a divorce.
As you can see, Brett might be successful in the financial sense, but the rest of his life is less than average. He has no time for his relationship, and his wife has actually asked him for a divorce. He has no time to exercise, eats fast food on a daily basis, and unwinds from the stress of the day by drinking alcohol. In short, Brett has prioritised making money over his physical health, mental health and his relationship. What’s worse is that he has no one to point out his blind spots, or help him to make changes in his life to improve his situation, so he’s likely to end up getting divorced, split up half of his business assets with his wife in the process, and continue on with his unhealthy lifestyle.
Honestly, at the end of the day, all of your financial or business success will mean nothing if you don’t have the confidence, freedom and people you love to enjoy it with you. And the only way to guarantee that, is to work with a coach.
What happens if you don’t have a coach?
You might be thinking that you don’t need a coach because you’re pretty happy with where you’re at. But good is not good enough if it can get better. The truth is, if you’re not progressing, you’re actually going backwards. To find out why settling and being complacent is one of the worst things you can do, be sure to read our blog on complacency.
If you don’t have a coach while trying to lose weight, you will continue to keep going around in circles — losing weight and then putting it on again— because you won’t be changing any of the fundamental factors that have contributed to you being overweight in the first place.
Instead, you’ll continue to make excuses as to why you can’t lose weight. You’ll attract toxic people into your life who enable your excuses and complacency, or who continue to expect you to please them, instead of putting your own needs first. Whatever weight loss results you may have obtained, you will lose because you’ll end up falling back into old habits with no one there to show you the blind spots that are sabotaging you. And if you try to lose weight on your own, you’ll end up focusing on the wrong things, which means it will take longer and cost more to get to your goals — if you get there at all.
If you’re wondering if it’s worth the investment in working with a weight loss coach, ask yourself the following:
How long have you been trying to lose weight? 5, 10, 15 years? Maybe more?
How many hours does that equate to? And how much money would that be, if you put a dollar value on each of those hours?
How much have you already spent on diets over this time?
How many more years do you want to spend trying to lose weight? Another 10-15?
And do you want to waste another couple of decades of your life feeling bad about who you are, ashamed of what you look like, and frustrated with yourself, only to give up because you’re ‘too old’ and it’s too hard?
Is life really worth living if you’re so unhappy with your life and who you are?
How we help
Wouldn’t you like to be free of your weight problems once and for all?
Imagine how different your life would be if you never had to worry about what you looked like, or what you were going to wear. Imagine having the confidence to attend social events or have your photo taken without hiding in the background. Imagine feeling proud of what you look like instead of trying to find clothes to cover up your body.
Well, you can!
Through our personalised, online coaching program, you can have access to not one but TWO weight loss coaches to help you lose weight and keep it off for good, without the fear of being judged. And because we develop step-by-step action plans based on the things you need the most help with, you don’t need to worry whether our online coaching program will work for you, because your plan is developed with your current hurdles and your goals in mind.
Right now, our online coaching program is OPEN. This program, delivered completely online will give you the tools, skills and knowledge to help you lose weight in a sustainable way without all the guesswork involved in trying to do it alone. Find out how it works and then, click the link below to see if you qualify.
If you’re not ready to commit to our online program, sign up to myPersonalised eCoaching program, our NEW state-of-the-art, at-home, do-it-yourself 6-week program designed to help you bridge the gap between exercise and long-term results. Customised for you to reach your personal goals, build healthy habits around mindset, discipline, nutrition and exercise that stick, and transform your life. You get 12-months’ worth of content compressed into 6 weeks, complete with worksheets, personalised action steps and resources. You also have lifetime access so you can learn at your own pace, and revisit any lessons you need to.